Many families are choosing to go with an open adoption route and even have a relationship with the birth family. In a survey of over 100 adoptions agencies, more and more families are wanting to meet the adoptive family and choose the family their child goes to. The article goes on to state that about 55% of the adoptions of infants are now completely open. This means that they agree to have ongoing contact with the family, including allowing the child to.

Do you think this is a good thing if the family giving the child up wants contact or could this cause emotional problems for the child early on? Would you want an open adoption for those of you have or would you rather it stay closed until your child is 18 and they can decide for themselves to contact their birth family?

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For me personaly I would love to adopt and would'nt mind having an open adoption. I feel that many young girls become pregnant and know they cannot offer what an adoptive family could, so I would not mind allowing them to stay in contact but under the agreement that they understand that they are giving up all rights. I feel this would set a huge example to the child/children that you allowed them to remain or to have contact with birth parents and if any medical issues rose you can also have that option to get information quicker. Great conversation and would love to read other's opinion

I think if it's an adoption where the parents could not provide for them like a young teen mother then I would certainly be open to the idea of staying in contact. The only situation I wouldn't want to do that is if the child is in foster care because the family was a danger to them. That to me would be enough to keep them away until the child could make the decision or there were supervised visits. I wonder... do you think it would be difficult for the child wondering why their parents gave them up in an open adoption case?

Kelley said:

For me personaly I would love to adopt and would'nt mind having an open adoption. I feel that many young girls become pregnant and know they cannot offer what an adoptive family could, so I would not mind allowing them to stay in contact but under the agreement that they understand that they are giving up all rights. I feel this would set a huge example to the child/children that you allowed them to remain or to have contact with birth parents and if any medical issues rose you can also have that option to get information quicker. Great conversation and would love to read other's opinion

I would think that if they were raised with an open adoption and knew both sides of the family then it would be normal to them. And they mostlikely wouldn't question it kinda like those that have never had one parent or the other around they generally don't really question it or those raised by gay or lesbian couples to them its normal. Its the rest of the world that wonders about it. lol.. But I do think its a good idea for those willing to do it.

Jennifer Ryan said:

I think if it's an adoption where the parents could not provide for them like a young teen mother then I would certainly be open to the idea of staying in contact. The only situation I wouldn't want to do that is if the child is in foster care because the family was a danger to them. That to me would be enough to keep them away until the child could make the decision or there were supervised visits. I wonder... do you think it would be difficult for the child wondering why their parents gave them up in an open adoption case?

Kelley said:

For me personaly I would love to adopt and would'nt mind having an open adoption. I feel that many young girls become pregnant and know they cannot offer what an adoptive family could, so I would not mind allowing them to stay in contact but under the agreement that they understand that they are giving up all rights. I feel this would set a huge example to the child/children that you allowed them to remain or to have contact with birth parents and if any medical issues rose you can also have that option to get information quicker. Great conversation and would love to read other's opinion

Sometimes young people who make mistakes continue to make mistakes throughout their adulthood.  16 and Pregnant and TeenMom come to mind.  What happens if you make a legal/binding agreement that the birth parents can be involved in the childs life and they have a lifestyle you do not agree with?  What if they are abusing drugs or involved in illegal activity?  Would you have to go back to court and alter the adoption agreement if you did not want them to have contact with the child because of their behavior? 

 

On one hand, I can see a benefit to the open adoption. The child could know where they come from, know first hand why they were adopted and have easy access to medical records.  I am just not sure that the possible other problems would be good for the child.  I think it would be a really hard call for an adoptive parent.

I agree. That is why I would teeter on whether to do an open adoption or not. The medical history is great to know but what if the families are not something you want your children around? Of course that is a lot of "what ifs". I guess if the situation is something that you are comfortable with then by all means have an open adoption. I would have to personally carefully weigh out what would be the best for the child in the long run.

Cynthia Zou said:

Sometimes young people who make mistakes continue to make mistakes throughout their adulthood.  16 and Pregnant and TeenMom come to mind.  What happens if you make a legal/binding agreement that the birth parents can be involved in the childs life and they have a lifestyle you do not agree with?  What if they are abusing drugs or involved in illegal activity?  Would you have to go back to court and alter the adoption agreement if you did not want them to have contact with the child because of their behavior? 

 

On one hand, I can see a benefit to the open adoption. The child could know where they come from, know first hand why they were adopted and have easy access to medical records.  I am just not sure that the possible other problems would be good for the child.  I think it would be a really hard call for an adoptive parent.

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