State Trying To Pursue Sperm Donor For Child Support

A man who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple so they could have a child he relinquished all parental rights, including financial responsibility for the child. The parents have now filed for state assistance and the state wants him to pay child support. The couple broke up but still co-parent their 8 children that range from 3 months to 25 years. The state demanded to know the donor's name when they filed for help because they want him to pay child support. 

What are your thoughts on this case? Should the man support the child when he donated his sperm? What do you think this would do for those who just donate but have given up their rights? 

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HELL NO  he should not be responsible forf it at all. He did these women favor and gave them a gift and now the damn state wants to get child support for the kid that is BS. Go after the other actual parent not the person that did this with no intention of being the "father". I don't care if they went through a physican or not. When someone gives up their rights to a kid they did just that and should not be held for child support.

I was thinking the same thing 2girlsmom. If they are the parents then those two are responsible for those children. I'm not sure what precedent they have for going after the biological father. He signed away all his rights to the child and now that the people who wanted and took care of the child can't afford to they want help from him... Something doesn't seem quite right to me...

under florida law unless you go through a doctor then your not a sperm donor but a biological father. They can not just sign a contract saying that he gives up his parental rights and has no finical obligations to the child ..  the way the state sees it the birth mother is a single mother and he is the biological father. the other parent is just some family friend with no real legal obligations,claim, or responsibility to the child.  The only thing a private donor contract does in the state of florida (if you do not go through a doctor) is give the state a piece of paper saying that the donor gave his dna to this child making him the biological father. apparently the same goes for their state as well. 

Now the way i see it .. I wish the law would change and that any sperm donor who wishes to do a private donation without going through the cost of doctors and etc. could sign away their parental rights and their finical obligations and that they could sign them over to the other person doing the parenting if there is one.  Then of course you would have people who abuse that. sooooo yeah he should have read the law for his state.. It isn't right or fair what they did but it is the law..

Well A) this isn't in Florida but I see your point however, from what I got out of the article they legally went through the court system to remove his rights to protect all parties. So if it was done through the court system regardless of if a Dr was invovled or not then they should in no way be able to go after him for child support. I am curious as to why the partner did not adopt the child since they have several.

tender said:

under florida law unless you go through a doctor then your not a sperm donor but a biological father. They can not just sign a contract saying that he gives up his parental rights and has no finical obligations to the child ..  the way the state sees it the birth mother is a single mother and he is the biological father. the other parent is just some family friend with no real legal obligations,claim, or responsibility to the child.  The only thing a private donor contract does in the state of florida (if you do not go through a doctor) is give the state a piece of paper saying that the donor gave his dna to this child making him the biological father. apparently the same goes for their state as well. 

Now the way i see it .. I wish the law would change and that any sperm donor who wishes to do a private donation without going through the cost of doctors and etc. could sign away their parental rights and their finical obligations and that they could sign them over to the other person doing the parenting if there is one.  Then of course you would have people who abuse that. sooooo yeah he should have read the law for his state.. It isn't right or fair what they did but it is the law..

I honestly dont know about kan. law but in the state of florida there is no such thing as a second parent adoption . Unless you are married to the biological parent you can't adopt the kid unless both biological parents sign over their parental rights in court placing the child for adoption and making you the only parent . There are step parent adoptions in the state of florida but unless you are a male female couple you can't get or be married in the state of florida .  Maybe their state doesn't have second parent adoption. 

http://cjonline.com/news/2012-12-31/topeka-sperm-donor-child-suppor... this says they just signed an agreement no mention of court order. and apparently the other parent told the state that she was responsible for things and the state told her no . to quote the article . "He said: “It’s my understanding that (Bauer) told the department of child services right off the bat, ‘I will be financially responsible for this’ and they in essence told her, ‘No, get lost. You’re not part of this.’ And when somebody’s willing to say ‘Hold it a minute, I’m the one who’s responsible for this’ and another agency says ‘No, get lost,’ whether it’s bureaucratic politics or something more than that — it’s a Republican state, yeah, I think it’s politics.” " 

 

I knew that if a bio parent removed their rights that another could adopt the child but I did not realize that Florida still wouldn't allow the partner in a gay relationship adopt the child. That is just  %$#@ed up. I knew about the marriage but to me it is BS that they are not allowed either one who the hell cares. I know several gay couples that are much better parents than straight ones and have been in relationships longer than heteros have. No, I am not gay but if find it appalling. either way I don't think the guy should be held responible thats not right.
The other article you posted was a bit more informative. Thanks :)
tender said:

I honestly dont know about kan. law but in the state of florida there is no such thing as a second parent adoption . Unless you are married to the biological parent you can't adopt the kid unless both biological parents sign over their parental rights in court placing the child for adoption and making you the only parent . There are step parent adoptions in the state of florida but unless you are a male female couple you can't get or be married in the state of florida .  Maybe their state doesn't have second parent adoption. 

oh i agree he shouldnt be but that is the way the law is set up ... every day I wait at home holding my breath hoping my better half gets home safe from work because i have no legal claim to our son... trust me it SUCKS! knowing at any min something can happen to her and her family could be &&*#* and walk in and take him and there is nothing i can do! 

The law sucks, and it's BS that they're going after him, but it's my understanding the state is going after him due to benefits paid on the child's behalf  ($6,000 alone stemming from his birth, which causes me to assume Medicaid sucked up the cost for that). So, if they needed the state's help to pay for the care associated with having the child in the first place, and they need the state's help to care for it now, perhaps they should have thought about these things before placing an ad on Craigslist asking strangers to sell them sperm for $50 (yes, this is how they acquired it, though it's my understanding he didn't accept the payment). Did they really NEED to create a life they can't support on their own? Probably not. 

if he's biologically yours, all you have to do is go down to the courthouse with the child's mother and sign an Affadavit of Paternity; this will establish you as the legal father in the event that something happens to her and guarantee your parental rights. Lots of states offer this option in the hospitals now, since so many folks AREN'T married, but it would seem Florida is behind the times on this one.

tender said:

oh i agree he shouldnt be but that is the way the law is set up ... every day I wait at home holding my breath hoping my better half gets home safe from work because i have no legal claim to our son... trust me it SUCKS! knowing at any min something can happen to her and her family could be &&*#* and walk in and take him and there is nothing i can do! 

well I am female so it wouldn't do any good for us to go to the court house. It was illegal for me to be put on the birth certificate at the hospital.  As for biological parents the male can be added to the birth certificate if the parents are married or not  at the hospital. If the mother refuses the father can go to court and have a dna done and get his parental rights there.If something happens to the mother the biological father (even if he isnt on the birth certificate) can go to court and get his kid with a simple DNA test.  Marriage has nothing to do with parental rights.  

 Florida law will not allow same sex couples to become married thus we can not adopt the children our significant other carried and gave birth to (sounds like bull shit sense we have been together 8 yrs live like a married couple and raise a child like one!)  . because Florida law does not have second parent adoption . only step parent adoption and you have to be married in the state of Florida to do a step parent adoption . They also will not allow us to simply be added to the birth certificate at birth . So yeah i will sit and worry . 

Kelly said:

if he's biologically yours, all you have to do is go down to the courthouse with the child's mother and sign an Affadavit of Paternity; this will establish you as the legal father in the event that something happens to her and guarantee your parental rights. Lots of states offer this option in the hospitals now, since so many folks AREN'T married, but it would seem Florida is behind the times on this one.

tender said:

oh i agree he shouldnt be but that is the way the law is set up ... every day I wait at home holding my breath hoping my better half gets home safe from work because i have no legal claim to our son... trust me it SUCKS! knowing at any min something can happen to her and her family could be &&*#* and walk in and take him and there is nothing i can do! 

can your partner leave in her will that she wants you to be the legal guardian and NOT any relatives? I thought usually when you have a will like that, that is through an attorney, courts will follow the will because that is what the parent wanted. As long as the new guardian is able to support and has no issues that would prevent them from being the new "parent".

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